MacOpz-De-Vangelism

Devangelism #2 or Spacedog Bitches for Half a Page

The computing world as I see it.

Hola boys and girls. I was just thinking, what's the best way to get the ball rolling with this column? After about five seconds of careful thought, I decided that I should talk about what was currently on my mind as far as computers and the Macintosh world go. So, here it is, the computing world from my point of view.

1: Why do they make G3s run while they're open? If I open my G3, and pop out the video card, or my RAM, or ANYTHING ELSE ON THE COMPUTER, what the hell is going to happen? I'm guessing IT WILL NO LONGER RUN. So, what's the point? Okay, its cool that is just folds down, but who gives a rosy red rats ass whether or not it runs while its open?

2: I love speakable items. Its just so damn cool. I can turn off AppleTalk, Launch my web browser, even put the computer to sleep. And, here's the best part, (Pay attention PC folks,) IT ACTUALLY WORKS. When I say something, the computer does it. Sort of a Star Trek, Captain Kirk thing going on...

3: Users of both platforms have some lame-ass arguments. PC users find the smallest event, and blow it up to signify the doom of Apple. Mac users stereotype PCs and Windows. And half the time, they have no arguments at all, ( the word Windoze is not considered a valid point, guys.)

4: John C. Dvorak. Exactly when did this guy become a complete prick?

5: All these new 3D games. The next PCer that gives me crap about half life is gonna get a boot to the head. As far as I'm concerned, Half Life, Unreal, even Quake III are pretty much the same game. Sure, there's a few different graphics, levels, etc. but the points are all the same: blow shit up. Of course, that's not to say I don't enjoy these games, but I could care less if one out of eight wont run on my machine.

6: Virtual Memory has improved. When I got my G3, Virtual memory was already turned off. Knowing what previous versions were like, I turned it off. No apparent difference. Granted, Escape Velocity: Override isn't exactly demanding software...

7: As far as desktop enhancements go, the Mac is light years ahead. Kaleidoscope is infinitely better than litestep, or any other Windows enhancement. Bottom line, when artists get the chance to design a computer or an interface, it looks good. Hence, the iMac, G3, and G4.

8: On the subject of Kaleidoscope, why do most of the new schemes suck? Albie Wong is an excellent designer, and put out quality schemes. Carl Pitts does not. People like that should be limited to one scheme every other week. Umm, okay, I'm about out of pet peeves for now, so Ill tell you what I'm running, and wrap this thing up: Until about three weeks ago, I ran a Performa 6116CD. My internet access was available only through a PC. Of course that all changed when I bought a G3 350 DVD. It rocks, and I'm getting a modem and a hookup within the next month. Well, I'm about done for today. Tune in next time when I introduce Spacedog's Sack.
-Spacedog Spiff (Dec. 3, 1999)


	Devangelism #2 or Spacedog Bitches for Half a Page The computing world as I see it. Hola boys and girls. I was just thinking, what's the best way to get the ball rolling with this column? After about five seconds of careful thought, I decided that I should talk about what was currently on my mind as far as computers and the Macintosh world go. So, here it is, the computing world from my point of view. 1: Why do they make G3s run while they're open? If I open my G3, and pop out the video card, or my RAM, or ANYTHING ELSE ON THE COMPUTER, what the hell is going to happen? I'm guessing IT WILL NO LONGER RUN. So, what's the point? Okay, its cool that is just folds down, but who gives a rosy red rats ass whether or not it runs while its open? 2: I love speakable items. Its just so damn cool. I can turn off AppleTalk, Launch my web browser, even put the computer to sleep. And, here's the best part, (Pay attention PC folks,) IT ACTUALLY WORKS. When I say something, the computer does it. Sort of a Star Trek, Captain Kirk thing going on... 3: Users of both platforms have some lame-ass arguments. PC users find the smallest event, and blow it up to signify the doom of Apple. Mac users stereotype PCs and Windows. And half the time, they have no arguments at all, ( the word Windoze is not considered a valid point, guys.) 4: John C. Dvorak. Exactly when did this guy become a complete prick? 5: All these new 3D games. The next PCer that gives me crap about half life is gonna get a boot to the head. As far as I'm concerned, Half Life, Unreal, even Quake III are pretty much the same game. Sure, there's a few different graphics, levels, etc. but the points are all the same: blow shit up. Of course, that's not to say I don't enjoy these games, but I could care less if one out of eight wont run on my machine. 6: Virtual Memory has improved. When I got my G3, Virtual memory was already turned off. Knowing what previous versions were like, I turned it off. No apparent difference. Granted, Escape Velocity: Override isn't exactly demanding software... 7: As far as desktop enhancements go, the Mac is light years ahead. Kaleidoscope is infinitely better than litestep, or any other Windows enhancement. Bottom line, when artists get the chance to design a computer or an interface, it looks good. Hence, the iMac, G3, and G4. 8: On the subject of Kaleidoscope, why do most of the new schemes suck? Albie Wong is an excellent designer, and put out quality schemes. Carl Pitts does not. People like that should be limited to one scheme every other week. Umm, okay, I'm about out of pet peeves for now, so Ill tell you what I'm running, and wrap this thing up: Until about three weeks ago, I ran a Performa 6116CD. My internet access was available only through a PC. Of course that all changed when I bought a G3 350 DVD. It rocks, and I'm getting a modem and a hookup within the next month. Well, I'm about done for today. Tune in next time when I introduce Spacedog's Sack. -Spacedog Spiff (Dec. 3, 1999) Web Design for the 21st Century
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